Reseller Associates
Anyone can be a friend of the court.
EVERYTHING IS FOR SALE
Our elite Reseller Associates are licensed to sell any relative of any justice to anyone. Whether you are charging for dinner and drinks or real estate transactions, the Clarence Thomas Collection assists resellers with billing services and hospitality accounting. Also, political action groups can rent either Thomas for cocktail parties and fundraising events. Being able to say you’ve got a judge in your pocket is the gold standard of grift in Republican circles. It practically pays for itself.
NMOG Sale (no mention of Ginni)
Reseller: Ginni Thomas
Move over BOGO, NMOG is here. Disenfranchising is more affordable than ever. If you keep her name off the paperwork, you can take away somebody's rights for as little as $80,000.
Johny & Jane Collection
Reseller: Jane Roberts
Value-priced Jane Roberts, who is married to Chief Justice John Roberts, quietly offers “hospitality recruitment” services to connected law firms, starting at only $10.3 million.
Gorsuch Real Estate
Reseller: Walden Group
Justice Neil Gorsuch offers completely confidential real estate deals in exchange for “law firm friendships,” starting at only $500,000.
JUDICIAL EducaTION PROJECT
Resellers: Leonard Leo and Kellyanne Conway
Ginni Thomas has sparked controversy in the past with her pro-Trump, anti-democracy activities. However, it's her passion for education that is currently drawing attention.
Alongside Leonard Leo and Kellyanne Conway, the Judicial Education Project helped educate Ginni. She then used her newfound knowledge to educate her husband Clarence. The educators paid as little as $100,000 for an entire Ginni.
Prudence™ Classes
Resellers: Neil Gorsuch, Clarence Thomas, and Brett Kavanaugh
Whether you're a law student or an ideological backer with interests before the court, our new two-week Prudence™ classes provide you with the tools you need to serve, discuss, and purchase justices with confidence.
The Prudence classes take place at George Mason's Scalia Law School and are taught by a prudent group of justices, including Neil Gorsuch, Clarence Thomas, and Brett Kavanaugh.
Ask about our Fall program in Italy*, starting at $30,000.
*Padua Italy classes includes a Tuscany Day Trip from Florence: Siena, San Gimignano, Pisa and Lunch on the Bench®️with a participating Republican justice.
The Crow Two-For-One Special
Resellers: Kathy and Harlan Crow
Want to take power away from federal regulators like the EPA?
Consider hiring the husband and wife team of Kathy and Harlan Crow to “educate” the Clare from two different angles.
First, Kathy and the Manhattan Institute will teach Clarence how to end the Chevron doctrine. And then Harlan and the Club will follow up with letters telling Clarence when to end the Chevron doctrine.
Now that Clarence has the reigns of the court, billionaires are paying him to eliminate evil "federal regulators" and let the Trump-tained judges decide what is right and wrong.
*In Chevron v. Natural Resources Defense Council, the court ruled that courts should defer to a federal agency’s interpretation of a questionable statute.
"I really wasn’t aware of the plight of inheritance." -CT